I found myself in a manic fit of creative energy the other day, the type where I MUST. MAKE. SOMETHING. NOW! I could have turned to baking, to drawing, or even to–I don’t know–writing?
But no. This was the type of fit where nothing but crafting something with an empty Zicam bottle would quench my artistic thirst.
Luckily, I had one on hand. Taxed with the mission of deciding what to create with it, I let my mind wander. The best it could come up with was “roll it in loose tea leaves and see what happens.”
Well folks, this is what happened:
I’ll give you a moment to collect yourselves. I know it is hard to handle.
Whew-ee! Is it hot in here, or what?
Not to brag, but to call this a work of genius would be an undersell. This is a tour de force of creativity on the level of Vivaldi’s Four Seasons and a classic that rivals Homer’s the Iliad. I usually don’t like to toot by own horn, but I think this piece warrants it.
You might be asking yourself “what is it supposed to be?” If it has to be anything, here are some ideas:
- It is a decoy bottle used to drop off small illicit materials, such as expired Hit Clips. One simply slips the contraband inside the bottle and leaves it in a dirt patch somewhere. Blends right in!
- It is a fake ant hill. An upgrade from the Whoppie Cushion, this is a prank that’ll leave your friends in hysterics, especially when you put it right next to the kitchen table.
Ultimately, these two could work, but what I really think it is is a conversation piece. Everyone needs one in their home, right? Something that gets people chatting, laughing, ogling.
This. Is. That. Piece.
I can’t tell you how many times friends and guests alike have said “Wow, what the hell is that?” or just screamed in response. Instantly, we have something to talk about, and soon they’re marveling at my creative prowess. Just the other day, a couple of friends were over for tea, and one of them caught sight of the Majestic Ant Colony. “Uhhh, what is this?” Her awe was obvious. I told her exactly how I made it, and she responded, “Wow, you would think this looks good.”
I’m taking that as a compliment!
Anyway, I won’t make a tutorial for this thing, because what is there to explain? Just go batshit crazy for 10 minutes, and there you have it: a conversation piece sure to impress and amaze.